The Emotional Fallout of a New Year
It’s a New Year.
Many are hyped up with just the thought of leaving the past behind and a chance for a new beginning. They’re excited and dreaming big and then there’s you. You seem surrounded by people embracing it all and you just can’t do it.
What happens when you aren’t able to step into the excitement of “New”. What happens when you don’t have the will or strength to move forward, when you can’t let go and move on, when you feel incapable of “new”? Maybe you’ve had to let someone or something go in the previous year and don’t feel ready, able, or willing to move forward into the unknown without that special person, that job, that home, that sense of belonging. What if the past year brought health issues that are left unresolved?
For some, and maybe this is you, going into the new year is fraught with anxiety, sadness, melancholy, and an uneasiness whose grip leaves you unable to fully breathe.
I’ve been here, and not just once. It’s hard. It sucks - literally feeling like your Lifeforce has been sucked right out.
If you know this feeling in any of its varying ways, shapes, forms, and degrees, Read On. I have some ideas for you. Some of them you might be tired of hearing about. That’s okay. Skip it. Move on to the next idea. Hopefully, at least one suggestion here piques your interest and you’ll give it a try. You’ll give it a “go”. Maybe it’s enough to move forward - just a little bit.
My Top 10 " Tries"
1. Immerse Yourself In Nature: Get outside and observe Nature, go to an arboretum or a conservatory. Walk around and through the natural world. Observe it in all of its life cycles. Breathe it in and out. Sit in it.
2. Play Music: “Music is a balm for the soul”! Go Listen to Live Music. And, when this isn’t possible, play music in your home - play it loud, soft, or somewhere in between. It doesn’t matter. Just Play It, and Play it, and Play it.
3. Practice Gratitude: Practice Gratitude starting with the most basic things we can all be grateful for - if you’re sitting in a chair, start with the chair. Or, since you’re reading this, start with your eyes. If you can’t think of anything, just start here, right where you are.
4. Dance: If this is too hard to imagine right now, just sway and work from there. Do it Badly, Do it Boldly, Do it Wildly, Do it while sitting down, standing up, standing up on a chair, moving down the street, at a stoplight. Just Dance. Here’s something to get you started:
5. Alternate Color/White: Alternate between immersing yourself in Color one day and in Whiteness another day. Use Color for the energy it can bring and its release, and White for the stillness, clarity, and breadth of possibility it invites in.
Play boldly with Color. Wear it on your body. Hang it on your walls. Find it in Nature. Paint.
Wear White. Stare at a blank canvas or at an expanse of newly fallen snow.
6. Call in Spirit. Talk to the Tree Spirits, the Water Spirits, the Animal Spirits, Your Ancestors, and my favorite...the Angelic Realm. There is something Alive outside of you that you can tap into for comfort and renewal. It’s waiting for you to ASK for support. Ask and You Shall Receive!
7. Name your discomfort and Write a Letter to It: Address a letter to your pain, anguish, sadness, grief, isolation. Name what’s holding you back and talk to it through a letter. Ask questions through your letter. Why are you holding on to me? What can I do to release you? Is there something else underneath you that I also need to know? What are you here to teach me? What can I do to help you move on?
Read your letter out loud, ask for support/answers to your questions. Sit in Silence and Listen within. Do this every day for a while and see what answers come to you.
Here’s an example:
Dear Sadness, You are a constant companion right now and you are wreaking havoc in my life. I feel immobilized by you. Your constant presence is taking a big toll. I’m feeling more and more alone in you. I feel like no one wants to be around me in my sadness.
(If you are someone who uses colorful language, just use it. Don’t hold back. Just say what you’re feeling. This is your letter and no one else ever needs to see this.)
Continuing…
I know you’re here to serve me in some way. But How and Why? Because right now, you suck. You are sucking my life away. I want to release you. This can’t be fun for you either. Being “Sadness” for me must be hard. Can I help you go, or at least calm you down, or make you a neutral party here? Ya - I know, “party” is not the right word for you unless it’s a party gone bad.
Please tell me what I can do to relieve you! I will sit here now and wait for your answer.
Yours Truly - for now,
Me
Then wait. Wait for several minutes or more. Write down anything that comes through, no matter how strange it may sound because sometimes, the feeling we have on the surface was a tipping point brought on by a most recent experience but in this example, “Sadness” was there before. We just seemed able to live with it before and ignored it as much as possible. And now, we can’t.
What is bringing us down now often has “friends” just below the surface. Perhaps these “friends” have been hiding underneath for weeks, months, years+. This may be true even if brought on by the tragic loss of someone important in our life. We seem to know this feeling already. It’s vaguely familiar, though not to this degree. We’ve had it before somewhere and at some time. This is why I ask you to repeat this exercise more than once.
8. Be in Beauty: Place something beautiful in every room of your home. Buy yourself some flowers. Light a candle as the night comes in. If you have a favorite pillow, piece of art, dishes, a beautiful card received, photos of loved ones, etc. put something in each room that you can look when you enter the room and begin to take in its Beauty. Look at it often. Can you recall a feeling associated with it that lifts you up, even just a little bit?
9. Cook Good Food: Feed your body and soul. You might not have a lot of energy to take this on in the beginning, so try to take a baby step toward it. There is something so calming and, at the same time energizing in preparing good, whole foods. Smell it, feel its textures, taste it, Breathe it in. Start with making yourself a bowl of cut apples. Look at the color of its outer skin. Smell its sweetness. Breathe it in. Now, close your eyes and see if you can taste its color, texture, and sweetness. Try another food. While you’re there, maybe turn on some music and enliven your experience.
10. Breathe: You’ve probably heard this many times before. Have you tried it?
Start by focusing on your breath and slow it down. Inhale slowly. Exhale deeply. Close your eyes. Keep going. Over time and as you continue this practice, play with its tempo - alternating a period of deep, slow breaths with short and forceful ones. If you want to take it further, look online or sign up for a Breathwork class or learn yogic breathing. We’ve been breathing our entire lives, yes. However, there is a lot to learn about how to use our breath to improve our health and wellness.
While these are my favorite “tries” or go-to's. You may also need to seek professional support. The good news is that there are many modalities of care to support you. Seek out one or more. There’s someone and something out there that will help. You don’t need to be all alone in your pain.
Besides traditional methods of therapy, give a holistic wellness modality of care a try. There are so many to choose from including Sound Healing, Acupuncture, Breathwork, Reiki, Massage, Healing Touch, Art Therapy, Somatic Bodywork - and more. Experiment and find what feels right for you.
To see what all is possible, take a look at the modalities of care at The Wellness Universe. Read about the many care providers who are able to support you in person or through on-line support. You don’t have to leave your home to get the support you need if that’s hard for you right now.
Of course, I’d love to support you through my work with holistic transcendence coaching, Reiki healing, and spiritually guided meditation, in person or through conference call options. Reach out. Take a step forward to take back your life.
With Love,
Jo Ann 💖✨